Erectile dysfunction is one of those things that affects many couples, and people still don’t talk about it enough. For some it could be a source of embarrassment and confusion, especially because it is associated with aging, illness or hormonal imbalances.
Before getting into this article, remember: a sexual disorder is something that can affect anyone. It is not a ‘failure’ on anyone’s part and it is nothing to be ashamed about! For most people, ED can be treated successfully with a combination of methods, both medical and alternative. But what if we told you that there could be a link between your media consumption and erectile dysfunction? More specifically: could porn be harming your sex life?Â
What does the research say?
While the increase of ED in younger populations casts pornography as an obvious culprit, there is still no proven link between porn and sexual dysfuntion. Porn is everywhere now. It’s free, it’s available, and it caters to every fetish or fantasy imaginable. So when it comes to porn, does the common-sense approach ‘too much of anything is bad’ hold true?
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The research is unclear, but what we do know is that porn triggers an instant release of dopamine, also known as our ‘happy hormones.’ A quick fix of dopamine! That explains why porn can be so addictive. For many, this addictive nature of porn can direct them to more specific or extreme types of porn to get that desired dopamine hit. As the body gets accustomed to this, a regular sexual experience may no longer feel exciting enough.Â
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But erectile dysfunction is not the only issue. Another common issue that could be related to porn is ejaculation control. Those masturbating to porn tend to do so very quickly, to avoid being caught. A hasty ‘quickie’ is quite normalised these days. While this may provide quick release, it also trains our bodies to orgasm very quickly, a habit that carries on into our sex life with other people. In fact, premature ejaculation may be far more connected to porn viewing than erectile dysfunction.
Porn and arousal:
ED is rarely a single-cause issue. Health, disease, age, exercise, habits like smoking and drinking, mental health and body image can all affect arousal and sexual health. For many, porn creates a safe atmosphere for arousal; one without fear of judgement or pressure to perform in front of another person. It makes arousal easier. At the same time, this comfort also makes it easier to ignore underlying issues and turn to porn as the only escape. Porn can also make you crave for newer and newer content. But when there is new content, perfect bodies and extremely specific sexual niches readily available online, regular sex with the same partner pales in comparision. Sex with another person can be complicated and messy, sometimes even intimidating. It requires work, communication, trust and vulnerability in a way that watching porn doesn’t. Porn can become an easy way out, at the expense of working on the issues that really matter.Â
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If this sounds like you and you suspect that watching porn is affecting your sex life negatively, then here are some questions to think over: Do you only feel like there is a problem during partnered sex? Do you find yourself dependent on porn to masturbate and reach orgasm? What sort of porn are you watching, do you get bored of one type of content and move on to the next quickly? By trying to understand which situations make arousal difficult, it can give you clarity on whether your problem is mental, physical, or a combination of both.Â
You think you may have a problem: Now what?Â
If you feel like porn is seriously affecting your sex life, consider speaking to a professional or a sex therapist. Otherwise, on your own, you could try masturbating without porn. Focus on situations outside of porn that have been arousing, invest more in connecting with your partner and visualising sex as an extension of that connection. Experience the sensation of touch, and maybe don’t even focus on orgasming initially. Get to know your body, even outside of a sexual context: what sort of sights, sounds, tastes and feelings do you enjoy? Deepening your connection with your body in everyday life is bound to be rewarding during sex.
While some groups suggest that porn should be given up altogether, the most practical approach is to enjoy porn in moderation or to watch porn that portrays more realistic sex and bodies. Porn-induced erectile dysfunction is still a debated idea. Overall, most experts agree that there is nothing inherently wrong with masturbation or pornography.
Like with everything else, what matters is how these practices fit into your life and how you relate to them. Health and wellness are complicated, diverse spectrums: there is no singular way to have a healthy sex life. So pay attention to your body, your feelings, pleasure and your individual desires and goals, and ask yourself: is porn helping or harming?